Welcome to this week’s Six Pack! Each week, I’ll share a mix of thoughts (some sports-related, some not) and I’d love for you to jump in with your reactions, ideas, or recommendations in the comments. Here’s what’s on my mind this week.
- The Masters Is Giving Me False Hope. Again.
It happened again last week. I got that familiar email, the annual rite of passage for golf fans everywhere. The reminder to apply for tickets to next year’s Masters.
Every time it shows up in my inbox, it gives me a little jolt of hope. A quick spark that leads to daydreams about Augusta. The azaleas, the dogwoods, the smell of fresh-cut fairways, and yes, maybe even a pimento cheese sandwich or two. It takes five minutes to enter. The process is smooth. The prices are fair. So of course, I submit my application.
But deep down, I already know how this ends. A few weeks from now, I’ll get the follow-up email saying I was not selected and should try again next year. I’ve been doing this for more than 20 years, and Augusta has no idea I exist. And yet, I will still try again.
Honestly, I love how the Masters does this. It is not about who you know or how much you spend. Anyone with an email address can take a shot, and we all have the same odds. It is very American, and it makes me feel just a little closer to one of the greatest events in all of sports.
Would I love to be picked someday? Of course. I would even settle for a practice round. But for now, just knowing there is a chance, even a long one, is enough to keep me coming back.
So here is to next year. Maybe. Hopefully. Probably not. But maybe.
- Wal-Mart is Just Not For Me
We do almost all of our grocery shopping at Kroger, and I genuinely like it. The store is a mile from our house, it’s big, clean, and I know exactly where everything is. It feels easy, familiar, and comfortable.
Years ago, when we lived in a different neighborhood, we used to go to Wal-Mart more often. But over time, the experience wore me down. When we moved, we basically stopped shopping there altogether and never really looked back.
That is, until the other day. I was driving by, had a random craving for something Kroger does not carry, and figured I’ll give it one more try.
Well, it was kind of nice to learn that some things never change. I found the item I came for, but bought nothing else. Some shelves were half-stocked, a few aisle layouts were confusing, the employees were not particularly warm or helpful, and the vibe overall… let’s just say it lived up to the Wal-Mart reputation we have all come to know.
I also noticed that prices on a lot of things were basically the same as Kroger. So for me, there just isn’t much upside.
I don’t mean to pile on, and I’m sure plenty of people love shopping there. But it’s just not for me. I think I’m good for another five years, at least.
- A Toast to Loretta Swit and My Favorite Female Sitcom Characters
Loretta Swit passed away last week at the age of 87. Some people may not recognize the name, but she famously played Major Margaret “Hot Lips” Houlihan on the 1970s classic M*A*S*H*.
I will admit the show was never really my thing, but my dad loved it. Because of that, I watched plenty of episodes growing up. Hot Lips was the only main female character in that legendary ensemble cast, and she held her own. She was tough, layered, and stood out during a time when most women on TV were sidekicks or background.
In her honor, I put together a quick list of my favorite female sitcom characters. This is not a definitive ranking of the most famous or most important. Just the ones I like the most.
5. Claire Dunphy (Modern Family)
Claire is the glue that holds her family together, and she does it all with sarcasm, wine, and nonstop eye rolls. She is smart, Type A, and still one of the funniest characters in the room. Her energy keeps the show grounded and relatable.
4. Edith Bunker (All in the Family)
Archie gets the spotlight, but Edith is the heart. Sweet and loyal, often dismissed as a “dingbat”, she quietly brings more emotional intelligence than anyone else on screen. When she dies and Archie breaks down, it is one of the most powerful moments I have ever seen on a sitcom.
3. Pam Beesly (The Office)
Pam is quiet, self-aware, and genuinely funny. Her relationship with Jim is iconic, but her eye rolls and subtle reactions are what make her so watchable. She stays grounded while everything around her spins out of control.
2. Mary Richards (The Mary Tyler Moore Show)
Mary was one of the first women on TV who was not defined by a man or a family. She had a career, a voice, and a real impact. The show was sharp and progressive, and Mary carried it with warmth and grace.
1. Elaine Benes (Seinfeld)
Elaine is my favorite. Bold, smart, flawed, and unfiltered. She matched the guys beat for beat in chaos and pettiness. From her dancing to her dating disasters to her battles with J. Peterman, Elaine always delivered.
- Could the Pacers Win It All?
I have written a few times recently about the Pacers and how much I like them. I even praised their coach Rick Carlisle on a recent podcast. He does not get nearly the credit he deserves. And while OKC answered loudly on Sunday night and I still think the Thunder ultimately will win it all, I have to give Indiana credit for what they pulled off in Game 1.
They did not just win on the road. They erased a 15-point fourth-quarter deficit and won the game on a buzzer-beater from Tyrese Haliburton.
This was not a fluke. The Pacers have now won five playoff games after trailing by 15 or more, which is a new NBA postseason record. That kind of poise and belief is rare.
Haliburton is the heartbeat of this team. He has hit clutch shots in every round of the playoffs. His most recent shot, with 0.3 seconds left in Game 1, was the latest Finals game-winner since Michael Jordan in 1997. Since 1971, teams trailing by 9 or more points with less than 3 minutes remaining in the game were 0-182 before Haliburton’s shot.
And yet, the Finals are still drawing low ratings. Maybe it is the markets. Maybe it is the lack of a megastar. But if you are skipping this series, you are missing something special.
The Thunder are still the favorites. But the Pacers are fearless, dangerous, and never truly out of a game until the final buzzer. And that is exactly why they just might bring home their first NBA championship.
- My Godson is a Great Golfer
I want to take a minute to brag about my godson, Jackson Vesper. He is twenty years old, the son of two of my closest friends, and he continues to impress.
Jackson grew up in Dallas and now plays college golf on scholarship at Binghamton in New York. He has real talent and works hard at it.
Just last week, his dad Keith sent me a picture of Jackson’s scorecard. Eighteen holes. Eighteen pars. Jackson felt good about the round but wished he had done more with a few of the par fives. That tells you everything you need to know about how he approaches the game.
And then came the fun part. On a recent round, Jackson hit a solid tee shot on a par three and landed it on the green. Then, feeling like he could do better, he dropped another ball and hit again. That shot went straight into the hole. It was a second ball, so obviously it does not count officially, but that is still ridiculously impressive.
I’ve been playing golf since I was eleven. I’ve had a few close calls, but still no hole in one. For most weekend golfers like me, it’s more luck than anything else. But Jackson has real game. Whether it drops on the first swing or the fifth, it’s coming off the hands of someone who actually knows what they’re doing.
Great shot, Jackson. Keep going. We’re all proud of you. And Scottie might want to watch his back.
- Big Cities with No Major Sports Teams
Living in Cincinnati, we are lucky. We have the Reds. We have the Bengals. And we have FC Cincinnati too. I love going to games, checking scores, and having hometown teams to root for. If any of them ever left, it would crush me.
That got me thinking: what about the big cities that do not have any major pro sports teams?
Two cities jumped out.
First is Austin, Texas. It is the 13th largest city in the country and one of the fastest growing. It has a young, wealthy, energetic population and a flashy new arena. Austin already has an MLS team, but no NBA, NFL, MLB, or NHL franchise. Football seems unlikely because of the Cowboys and Texans. Baseball has a long list of cities in front. Hockey feels like a reach.
But the NBA? That is possible. Austin has a strong basketball culture and all the right trends. If the league expands beyond two teams, Austin has a real shot.
The second city is Louisville, Kentucky. It is the 29th largest city in America and has no major professional sports teams at all.
Louisville has roots. It is a college basketball town. It makes the Louisville Slugger. And it has the KFC Yum Center, which could host an NBA team tomorrow. But the media market is small, and the league interest just is not there right now. Other cities have more corporate power and more national pull.
There is some soccer potential. Louisville City FC is strong in the USL, and Racing Louisville has done well in the NWSL. But MLS still feels like a long shot.
If you live in Louisville, I feel for you. But just remember, Cincinnati is only 90 miles up the road. We have chili on spaghetti, great breweries, and three teams you can get behind.
Thanks for checking out this week’s Six Pack, Sandman Nation! I’d love to hear your thoughts: what resonated with you, what you disagree with, or your own takes on these topics. Drop your comments and let’s keep the conversation going.
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